You have no idea how to talk dirty to your boyfriend, don’t you? Don’t worry, everything can be learned, and so can dirty talk. If you were raised in a family with strong traditional values, using dirty talk can be difficult, because it takes you out of your comfort zone. When it comes to using dirty talk in bed, you feel embarrassed, awkward, or you are totally blocked. You are afraid you might use the wrong words, that you will be laughed at, or that you will ruin the sexy atmosphere. And that probably makes you so uncomfortable using dirty talk.
The first rule of dirty talk
Men like hearing dirty talk. This is the first thing you should know. So, there is no need to be concerned that your boyfriend will dislike what you are saying to him… except for when you are not authentic. Dirty talk beginners might seem unnatural when using words they have never said in their entire life. But everything comes with practice.
If you decide to surprise your boyfriend by using dirty words in bed, but you are afraid you will make embarrassing mistakes, follow the golden rule: find out what your boyfriend likes to hear. You can ask him directly, or you can guess from his reactions. If you notice some words trigger better reactions than others, use those and become creative with them. So, if you want to learn how to talk dirty to your boyfriend, you have to learn what he likes and doesn’t like to hear.
The boundaries of dirty talk
What is dirty talk, after all? How dirty should it be? Dirty talk doesn’t necessarily have to be extremely dirty. You can choose the words that you are most comfortable with. Some guys like really dirty words, swears, or expressions that can make you blush instantly. But there are others who prefer a more soft language when it comes to dirty talk. That is why you should find out what the preferences of your man are.
If you feel uncomfortable using really dirty words, you can start by using the words and expressions you already are accustomed with and don’t have a problem using. It will give you the opportunity to experience, find out what pleases your boyfriend best, and it will be a good exercise that will prepare you to get to the next level.
After all, dirty talk should be a little dirtier than usual sex talk. After you get used to saying dirty words in bed, you can try upgrading your language. In time, using really dirty talk will become natural and spontaneous.
Of course, dirty talk has its boundaries, but only you and your boyfriend are the ones to set them. If you don’t like some words, or you don’t like to be called different names, you can tell that to your boyfriend. The purpose of dirty talk is to make sex even more pleasurable, not to disrespect each other, or start a fight.
Nonverbal communication is the key
Dirty talk doesn’t mean only saying the right words. It means saying them in a certain moment and in a certain way. You have to feel when the right moment has come and use all your body to communicate to your boyfriend. If you don’t mean what you are saying, your nonverbal communication will give you away. Use your hands, your lips, and your eyes to express everything you feel, and make your boyfriend fantasize about it.
Dirty talk also means using the inflexions of your voice to communicate how much you like what your boyfriend is doing to you. It could seem difficult at the beginning, but once you get comfortable with this, you will be amazed at the results.
It is important not to repeat yourself and to surprise your partner every time you make love. If you need some help finding new dirty talk ideas to experiment in the bedroom, you can check out Felicity Keith's Language Of Desire. It has hundreds of examples that will stimulate your imagination. To learn how to talk dirty to your boyfriend and rediscover the passion in your sex life.